What would you do if you were told you had no right to access information about your own identity? From a cheeky little girl, to a determined young woman; this is my story.
Monday, June 25, 2012
Does Biology Matter?
Monday, April 09, 2012
Knowing about your biological origins is a basic right
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Finally, full retrospective access recommended in Victoria!
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Secrets of the Father Become the Mysteries of the Child
Farrah Tomazin, Peter Munro
July 31, 2011Narelle Grech, 28, was conceived via a sperm donor; recently diagnosed with bowel cancer, she is desperate to find her biological father. Photo: Craig Sillitoe
Should the children of sperm donors have the right to know their fathers?
THE journey to find out where she came from started more than a decade ago for Melbourne social worker Narelle Grech.
At the age of 15, Ms Grech's parents told her that she had been conceived through a sperm donor - news she has been trying to deal with ever since.
''Since I found out, I've been really curious to know who this person is, and then as I got older it became a whole lot bigger than that. It became about searching for my whole paternal family and those missing pieces that make up a lot of who I am,'' she said.
Who's Your Daddy?
Ms Grech, now 28, became even more determined to find her donor a few months ago, when she was diagnosed with bowel cancer and needed to learn more about her genetic and medical history. But despite multiple attempts get information through the doctor who helped her parents conceive her, she's had no luck.
Across town, Paul (who did not want his surname used), also wonders about his family tree - but from a different perspective. A long-time blood donor, Paul, 59, decided to donate sperm in his mid-20s after separating from his first wife. Each Father's Day, he wonders what became of the four children he helped conceive through donations in 1978.
Now remarried with two adult children, he has registered his details with the Victorian voluntary register of donors and donor-conceived children, but has received no replies.
''When I donated, it had to be completely anonymous - I had to sign a document saying I wouldn't try to find the kids,'' he said. ''But I have often found myself wandering around looking at kids of about the right age, wondering who they are, how they are going, whether they need a hand.''
The question of whether donor-conceived children should have the right to access their donor's information (or vice versa) has always been a vexed issue; a balancing act between the right to privacy versus the right to know.
State Parliament has now re-opened the debate, as part of a broad-ranging inquiry by the law reform committee. The committee chairman, Liberal MP Clem Newton-Brown, said the inquiry would consider the legal and practical issues that arose if all donor-conceived Victorians were given access to information about their donors, and their donor-conceived siblings.
At present, the law varies depending on when the donation was made, resulting in a ''three tiered'' system. Victorians conceived using sperm donated after January 1, 1998, have unconditional access to information about their donors. Those conceived using sperm donated between July 1, 1988, and December 31, 1997, can access information about their donors if their donor consents. But those conceived before 1988 don't have the right to access, because donors have been granted anonymity.
For people like Ms Grech, the laws are frustrating and heartbreaking. For many donors, though, this is how it should be. Some were university students who made a donation for money; others did so for altruistic reasons and now have their own families. It is often argued that providing donor information could unfairly complicate their lives or risk making them financially liable.
Law Institute of Victoria president Caroline Counsel said the law should not allow the release of the personal details of either party without their consent. ''You cannot say after the event, 'We are going to superimpose a new regime of disclosure.' I think that is an abuse of an altruistic act,'' she said.
But film director Roger Clarke, who donated his sperm in the early 1980s, takes a different view.
Mr Clarke gave consent for his information to be passed on to his offspring. A few years ago he met Riley Denham, the 22-year-old man he helped create. The pair now consider each other as ''mates''.
''It was his lifelong ambition to meet me, so on his 18th birthday his mum and dad gave him the file,'' Mr Clarke said.
Mr Clarke said he understood most donors would want to remain anonymous, but thinks there could be a ''halfway point'', where non-identifying information, such as medical information, is accessible.
Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/secrets-of-the-father-become-the-mysteries-of-the-child-20110730-1i5fe.html#ixzz1Tf4by3xG
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Loss
Friday, August 14, 2009
The What Ifs..
Saturday, May 02, 2009
I am N.T.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Another piece of the puzzle
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Petition - Rights for all donor conceived people
http://www.clan.org.au/dcsg/legislation/petition.html
Thank you!
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Human Error
More and more DC people are coming forward in Melbourne, and more from the same clinic I was conceived, Prince Henry's. I knew the time would come and I'm happy that I can step back for a little while and let them take the reigns. I'll never completely give up searching (you should know that by now!), but for now some new (??) DC people have the energy that I once had in the early days of lobbying. It's somewhat of a relief... and it is also refreshing and inspiring all at once.
Anyway, my "donor file".... Some DC people born before me have more information than I do, as their donor files are still existent, or at least accessible. My donor file is simply not there, or maybe it is, somewhere at the public records office, maybe filed in the wrong place? Perhaps it was human error that means I can't know more about T5. Maybe it wasn't a mistake at all, maybe the "donor" was a doctor, who knows? (A few people, but not me). But surely, wherever this file is, it holds more information about T5... This part of my life continues to feel like a twisted movie.
I haven't stopped wanting to know more and I don't think I ever will.
I just realised that one of my DC sister's birthdays is in 2 days, on January 10th. Again, happy and sad. She was born in 1985, so she will be turning 23. If only I could take her out and spoil her rotten, like my big sister did!
On another note, I should thank all of the politicians here in Victoria who have been and continue to be supportive of us pre-1988 DC people gainging access to their true birth records. If anything, the lead up to the passing of the ART Bill (2008) proved to me that thinking around our cause is changing and we are no longer being blatantly disregarded, as we were in the early days. We are being heard, and that is a definate step in the right direction!!
The battle continues.....
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Thursday, October 09, 2008
My letter in the Age newspaper, Melbourne
AS A 26-year-old donor-conceived person I am very concerned about the hurried passing of the Assisted Reproductive Technologies Bill (2008) without proper insight into the consequences. The bill will not amend birth certificates to reflect the truth about a donor-conceived person's genetic origins, as is done for every other Victorian.
The bill also does not address issues for donor-conceived people such as myself, who were born prior to legislation, whose rightful information about their heritage remains locked up and only accessible to a privileged few.
I have no problem with gay and lesbian people raising children. My problem is that the Victorian Law Reform Commission was only concerned with the wants and so-called rights of adults to have children. Nowhere in the terms of reference was there mention of improving the already flawed legislation to make all donor-conceived people equal.
This is not good enough and if this legislation is passed as it is, we will be failing children born through donor conception.
//
I was privelaged to speak at Parliament House here in Victoria on Tuesday about my experience and the proposed ART Bill (2008). It is seriously flawed in that it does not address already existant issues for donor conceived people like myself and leaves open the potential for thousands of others born via DC to experience the same obstacles as those born decades ago.
I really hope that the Victorian Government takes a closer look at this Bill before passing it. Amendments need to be made so that it goes some way in making law equal for ALL donor conceived people and children.
Saturday, August 09, 2008
Friday, August 08, 2008
Friday, July 11, 2008
Unpublished Letter to the Age
The effects of donor conception on the donor conceived can not be truly measured yet. Until the truth about ones true conception is recorded on birth certificates the number of people conceived via donor can only be estimated; the number who are told will also remain unknown whilst there is no onus on parents to tell, and the long term psychological effects of this mutli million dollar practice will remain under wraps for the sake of the scientists and doctors who are making squillions from willingly and wrongfully deceiving people of their true identity.
I can not know who my bioligical donor father is due to the era of secrecy into which I was born. The fact that this information is filed and kept under lock and key and out of my reach is like psychological torture. It's cruel, dehumanising and wrong in every way. The fact that the current review of legislation by the Victorian Law Reform Commission failed to address the issue of TRUE birth certificates means that many other donor conceived people will feel the way that I do in years to come. It’s a shame that we can not learn from past mistakes for the benefit of future generations.
